Finally! My first digital painting!!!

It took all day but I FINALLY finished my first digital painting: It's a self portrait with what I think my wings would look like (cardinal wings, read previous post for more on that....).

"She with Cardinal Wings".. Click to zoom/better quality

It was fun using the tablet to draw, but it is going to take some more instruction to do more effects and such. I'm really happy with it and think parts of it are really neat (love the hand positions and details). And I know that that's male wings, not female, but I think the cardinal comes across stronger in red). I could probably go on working on it, but for a first painting I think this will do: Art is not completed, only abandoned.

Peace

New Design and Monet Ramblings...

I thought my blog page was looking a little boring so I thought I'd spruce it up a bit. I'm still getting used to blogging, and think I need to try to stick to my theme a little more, but atleast I'm not getting graded for this.
   I have cross country pictures and drug testing for most of the day today, and right now I'm recovering from our morning practice (some hot coffee sounds good, although I'm gonna be stuck at camp with out it on Thursday, instant coffee?). I consider running a real art form, we make strong bodies that  can carry us through woods and cross the country side. My legs have been giving me trouble lately and I'm not in as a great as shape as I would have liked, but sometimes its good just think "It's a gift one can run at all".
So what am I working on now you ask? Well, still getting used to blogging of course. And I started to paint country images on this white cotton dress I found (and blogged about) a while back. It has a very folk art quality to it and I think it's gonna be neat when it's all done. All of the images are stuff I've seen and has a special meaning to it from the country. I think it's almost like quilting. But with paint.

 

I went to the library yesterday and picked out a ton of art books (as usual) one of them is about Monet spending time in this garden, Giverny, to study and paint, it's really lovely. The images of his paintings and him walking around the garden are really inspiring, one quote reads:
    "His life is what he paints; and what he paints is his life.... He only wants one thing, to immerse himself in colour...He aores the whole beauty of nature, which he sees around him and which tortures him, for that is what he is so anxious to translate into paint - the innumerable, ever -changing beauties of nature."

The book tells of his experiences there and his struggle to capture not only the subject but the very air around it. 
I know how he feels. I wish I could spend all my time studying the beautiful colors and lights and greenery around me to translate into paintings. That is the life I want to life when it comes to art. I think when ever I paint, draw, or really create anything it's to honor the subject, the idea, the emotions behind it. There are SO many things I want to paint and create, but I am bound by few supplies and time constraints. Just as I sit here, the sunlight bouncing off the grass in the breeze is like a Walt Whitman poem in the form, how beautiful could it be in a painting! I've often prayed to God asking if I could ever capture the beauty He's created in the world.  If I could have a career where I could be given the resources to study the lights and colors around me I could live in peace.  I have one canvas left, it stops me from painting when all  I think "I better use this well!".
   With the white dress I'm not trying very hard, just painting what comes into memory. I really want to do some outdoor painting now, but soon I have to head back to the school for drug testing.

It's so lovely out.

Peace.

Bean Jumpers

I don't know whether it's becuase I'm getting stressed out and worried becuase of school coming up so (more like the choices about college and stuff really), but I've been a little troubled artistically and spiritually lately.

    Not long ago I went for a long run to calm my nerves. My ipod died not a mile in, and with out music I  could neither ignore falling into MY natural rhythm, or the negative thoughts in my head and heart. It was kinda strange, my body was falling into this calm running gate, on a lovely, bright summer day, and it gave open space for the dialog in my head to run in. Whether it was becuase I emotionally or physically tired, I started to lose my pace and decided to cut my run a block short and go down this lovely little road I haven't been on it a while.
   It's a road mainly there for the tractor and farmers to drive on, as it both connects and divides the different sections of field. It's mostly gravel, banked by a woods and corn on the one side, and soy beans and marching power towers on the other. I was immediately stuck by the imposing nature of these spacey, architectural towers, with such rigid and solid geometry using only lines of silver metal. It reminds me of the sci-fi themed sketches I saw of my mom's brother. (There's an interesting story about that I'll have to get to at another time). This road is gray white and edged with thick wild flowers and grass. The butterflies dart everywhere, but I am ever more growing tired and weary of the thoughts in my head as my feet are of hitting the ground. I noticed up ahead large, white cement structures used to tunnel a ditch that runs under this road, and almost subconsciously I veer over to the one side to sit down.
    With the cement block level to the road, I dangle my feet down into the miniature valley. Over run with thick wild flowers and weeds, I look down I can see the clear water running over the bronze mud. I can even see the little schools of fish, and I thought of how amazing it is that these fish ever have to worry about predators for being in such an isolate place. I feel hidden, alone, yet warm and comforted by the sun. I am glad to sit here, but I began to get teary eyed.
    So much worry, I think how in the end all I want is to full fill the best of God's plan for me. I say a prayer, and just as subconsciously as I sat down, I get back up. As I dragged myself way from the rural beauty I asked again for the strength to continue running. I walk some till I see a trio of red deer cross the road far in front of me. They leap and and run with such leisurely grace, I felt compelled to do the same. I watch them as I casually jog forward, I was happy they didn't notice me for a while and I could watch them enjoy themselves. Eventually, I did get their attention and they shot up those brilliant while tails and ran back to where they came, the larger one seemed leap over the road joyfully with it's bright orange body against the green. Truly a God send.

Rough paint sketch....

I did make it home eventually and thought of how I could paint or draw either instance. I didn't have much success, but I think I will especially work on a painting of the deer. I'll call em the Bean Jumpers.

Peace.

So Busy!!

So I devoted a portion of my day today working on a music poster for the lovely Laura Cortese, who is hosting a birthday bash in August. I'm hoping I can include everything that needs to be on there without making the poster look too busy, and as with most of the commissions I do, my number one concern is that the recipient is going to be happy with the results.

Aros the Gelding

   Generally this summer I've had the luxury of having lots of time open to work on pieces for long stretches of time to complete them: such as with this horse sign for a local stable owner who wanted a metal horse sign painted to look like her beautiful blue roan gelding, Aros. I would ride my bike to the barn and spend most of the day there painting (now I'm helping to put up fences and such, more on that later :). 
 Or like with the backdrops I mentioned in the last post, where I would just come with my younger brother to band camp and paint them outside there for long stretches of time.

The real horses don't know what to think!

   However today I was having trouble mixing in working on this poster with social things, and tomorrow I'm going to have to figure out a way to work on that, hanging with friends, and finishing more backdrops at the school! Not to mention I want to get some running in some how, although lately, I've felt really run down and out of it. I'm hoping sine I have to drive my brother into town today I can pick up a planner and some art stuff which might help me feel better. I don't know what I'm going to do once school actually starts.

Getting in the Hang of things....

    Hello Everyone! Welcome to my first blog entry, about which I'm excited to see how things go. I won't go too in depth of what plans I have for this, but I will give a little background. 

One of the artworks entered in my first Art show

   All of my life I have been making things: everything from making arts and crafts, to music and performances; from poems and movies, to gifts and props. It could be said, that much of my survival has depended upon my ability to making things. One could comb through our house and pull out boxes and stacks and bags full of the paintings, drawings, projects and trinkets I've made (in fact, last summer we did comb out all these things and tried to go to a portfolio review, more on that later). Not to mention the works I've given away as well (more on that later too).

   What I hope to explore here, is why exactly I make these things. Recently, I had entered some works into a local art show, I knew I shouldn't expect much from a first show, but that night I felt so terribly insecure. Perhaps it is because soon I'm going to have to find ways to live off my art, every passing look at any of my works feels like either the glance that gets me into a good college, or the glare that tells me to hit the drawing board again. I'm hoping that by documenting my 'projects' and reflecting on my past works, I'll better understand my methods and create better art; art that tells my life story and not just be a part of it. Not to mention the high possibly for having some fun as well.

   So if you'll please be patient as I get used to this whole blogging thing (which is a project in its self), I'll post snippets of the stuff I'm working on, and the things I learn about my art along my life's journey. 

    Even though it is currently thunder-storming outside (which is a rather spectacular way to end a killer heat wave of a week), I have a great feeling about this. 

Peace.